Ask Dr. Schwartz
Psychotherapy and Mental Health questions

Dear Dr. Schwartz,

I saw your article and wanted to ask a question if you have time to reply.
My 55 year old boyfriend had quadruple bypass surgery 4 years ago. We have been dating for 2 years now. People who knew him then have told me he is definitely different.

He has just told me he has been depressed ever since his surgery and he feels like a totally different person. He says that he doesnt think he will ever be able to "love" anyone again. I am very frustrated because I love him very much, and we have a great relationship. He does have an issue with our age difference (8 years). I think its ridiculous, and if he dies before me, so what? He doesnt want to fall in love, and pulls away from me every 2 months.

 Who's crazy me or him? I'm depressed now because of this yo yo pattern.
 
My question is....is this a symptom of the surgery? Did the anesthesia do something to him?

He used to take an antidepressant but discontinued it on his own,
about 6 months after we had started dating.
 
I just was hoping for a little help from someone! If you could spare some time, I would appreciate any answer you might have.

 

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